


All Consuming Flame

by Aini



Series: Fodlan Rebuilt [3]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Intersex, M/M, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-17 21:35:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29599080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aini/pseuds/Aini
Summary: I was going to post this tomorrow, but in honor of Felix's birthday (Feb 20th), I decided to post it a day early. This is part of my Fodlan Rebuilt series and the start of the Blue Lions part of the story. I hope you all will enjoy it!
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Series: Fodlan Rebuilt [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1906111
Kudos: 1





	All Consuming Flame

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to post this tomorrow, but in honor of Felix's birthday (Feb 20th), I decided to post it a day early. This is part of my Fodlan Rebuilt series and the start of the Blue Lions part of the story. I hope you all will enjoy it!

With a final flick of his wrist, Felix completed the motions of his attack, standing still as he let the silence settle around him. The training grounds were, thankfully, empty today. He wasn’t normally one to worry about training on his own or concerned if anyone was watching him, but today he had simply needed some time to himself. He had a spot in the woods that he normally went to for these kind of days, but it was pouring outside and the coverage of the training grounds would make it so he didn’t slip in any mud and hurt himself.

Breathing in deeply, he decided it was time to take a break, to wipe down the sweat and let his muscles rest a bit. As he wandered over to the side of the room, where he’d left his towel, he took a moment to reminisce, to think about a time he could no longer return to. The training grounds had almost always been occupied and he’d had no shortage of sparring partners most of the time. Raphael and Caspar had always been eager. Leonie, too, had been happy to train with him. He’d had plenty of people to keep him on his toes, keep him focused, keep his mind from wandering.

Now...now it was empty. The Faerghan army had reclaimed the monastery not so long back, the place having been abandoned by the Church once the war had fully broken out. Left empty for years, it had fallen into decay and despite their best efforts, the place still looked shoddy and broken. They hadn’t been here long, no, but most of their time was spent preparing for battle. Repairs came second to that, with the exception of the dorms, barracks, and the infirmary. Those places had been fixed up first, with the dining hall patched up after.

While he definitely enjoyed the silence from time to time, now was not one of those. Taking breaks, though important for his well being, gave his mind an opportunity to wander. One that it never gave up the chance to do just that. He didn’t like pondering on things. He didn’t like thinking about whatever was floating around on his mind other than training. It led to do many distracting and sad thoughts, things he’d rather avoid by either training, sleeping, or battling on the battle field. While he didn’t enjoy killing people (the boar had that part covered), he did enjoy a good fight.

But his mind never chose to focus on those things when he was taking a break. Instead it would think about the war, about what had started it. How he was fighting against former classmates on the battlefield. How many he’d injured or had been forced to strike down. He knew it was pointless to leave a foe alive during a war, but he felt he was fairly good at reading how devoted a person was to their cause, who had been forced to fight by their noble overlords. If he could manage it, he would leave those who had no true desire to fight alive, to live out their days with an injury, but alive.

Not that he always had the upper hand in a battle. He was skilled, something that he had worked very hard for, but even he had bad days. Days where nothing seemed to be going right. Their last battle had been one of those days for him. He frowned as he remembered the situation he’d gotten himself and his battalion into. They’d been entirely surrounded and if he hadn’t been fighting with such proficient warriors, he was sure they would have been wiped out entirely. But they hadn’t been separated for long.

Sylvain and his cavaliers had come to the rescue, cutting down the back of the circle and making a path for them to safely retreat.

Shaking his head, Felix forced his mind to think of something _other_ than the lancer, choosing instead to think of the other comrades he had in this war. It was honestly amazing, when he really thought about it, how all of those from the Blue Lions house were alive and fighting alongside him. Nothing could really describe how much it really pleased him. He may not say it out loud, but having people he knew, people he trusted, and even people he deeply cared about at his side was better than fighting alone.

Things had even taken an upswing lately if he were to think of the last few major battles they’d been in. Dedue had, in a sense, returned from the dead, a fact that had definitely bolstered their forces and their morale. Ashe had certainly been more cheery, and while Felix wasn’t the most adept at noticing other people and their feelings, it was hard to miss how much the archer adored the fortress knight. If Sylvain were to believed (and when it came to relationships, he definitely knew more than Felix), the two were growing closer. If that was true, Felix truly wished Ashe all the best.

He might not fully approve of Dedue and his blind devotion to their prince, but any happiness that could be found in these times was something he would never deny his friends.

In that regard, he’d been more than pleased to see how the relationship between Mercedes and Annette had grown. He wasn’t sure what had happened for them in the past five years, but whatever it had been had cemented their relationship with one another even further. The two were almost always sitting next to each other, taking comfort in the other woman’s presence, enjoying that company in the downtime they did have. They held hands, even shared little kisses with one another. It was sweet and Felix really did want the absolute best for the pair down the road.

Ingrid had also been vocal in her approval of how things had turned out for the two. He had a bond with the Pegasus knight. One that he doubted would ever be broken. Despite the fact that she had never legally been married into the family, she had always felt like a sister to him. Their occasional spats could certainly be described as ones between siblings. They had their disagreements, but he knew that she cared about him just as he cared deeply for her. It would never be a romantic love, he knew that very well, but he definitely felt a familial love towards her.

Felix scowled at the ground as that word clung to his mind. Love. He’d often heard that it had its ups and downs, but in his experience the downs weren’t worth going through for the ups. He knew how deeply he got attached to people, knew how much he cared about others, deny it though he might. It hurt when someone was hurt or didn’t return what he wanted to give them. His mother’s death had left a hole in his heart, his first experience with loss. He may not remember much about her, but did know that, even as a child, he had loved her dearly.

Even his love for his mother hadn’t compared to his love for Glenn. Glenn had been his support, been the big brother that everyone had ever wanted (or so Dimitri and Sylvain had told him). They’d had their fights, their arguments. It was normal for brothers to have. Yet Glenn had always been there for him, to take care of his tears and teach him how to be better, no matter what he’d decided to tackle. His brother’s death had shattered him, broken him in ways that no one could have hoped to fix. He’d healed, but there would always be scars from that broken bond, ones that he would always know were there.

Not even his father had been able to fix those cracks in his soul. He didn’t agree with his father’s views in life, especially after the loss of Glenn. They’d bickered so many times over those views that the love between them had strained, turned into something he couldn’t say he recognized. How he felt about his father was complicated. He knew his father cared about him. Rodrigue could ruin his life with what he knew about his son, but he instead opted to try and find ways that would make Felix happy, to try and give him things that would help him achieve his goals.

Perhaps that was partially why he would get so upset with how is father acted around Dimitri. Ever since he’d come to join the armies efforts on the front lines, the prince had nearly been the sole focus of his attention. Felix had hoped, vainly, that Rodrigue would have been able to direct the army’s focus towards Fhirdiad, to save the capital from the clutches of that vile woman. Instead, his father had given in to the prince’s demands, had put up such a minor resistance to his orders. He knew his father was made of sterner stuff. So why couldn’t he be the guide that Dimitri so desperately needed?

His chest tightened at the thought of the man, of the beast who was supposed to be his liege, his ruler. Despite not wanting to venture into this part of his mind, it was inevitable that he would eventually come back to his prince. It hurt to think about Dimitri, about one of his dearest and oldest friends. He’d suffered so much, more than anyone should ever have to go through, and that he’d given into the beast inside hurt Felix even more. Since the fall of the monastery until they’d reunited with him, Felix hadn’t seen Dimitri once, not even since his reported death.

He’d changed so much, changed into the boar that Felix had always claimed he was hiding. He’d been harsh during their academy days. Felix could recognize that now. He wondered if he’d been nicer if things would have been different. Not that it changed anything now. Dimitri had fallen so deeply into his own mind and thoughts that the swordsman had to wonder if there would be anything that would break their prince from this singular focus for revenge. Was the man he loved still inside that hulking form of a person?

His heart thudded in his chest and grit his teeth as he clenched his fist. That word again. And so painfully obvious in his own mind. How he felt about Dimitri wasn’t the same how he felt for Ingrid or his father. Wasn’t the same to how he felt towards the rest of his classmates. He had denied it for so long, but the reality of his affections for his prince were to hard to ignore. What made things worse was that these same affections, the feelings he held for Dimitri were the exact same when it came to Sylvain.

If there was anyone that Felix had loved longer than Dimitri, it was Sylvain. He’d been Felix’s friend the longest, had stuck by his side as much as he could, annoying and caring all in the same breath. Sylvain who acted like nothing had changed, who was more a steady sense of ‘normal’ than Felix had ever gotten from anyone else. Even with his skirt-chasing ways, the swordsman couldn’t help but be drawn to his best friend, to the man who would rather play a relentless flirt than act on his strategic strengths and be the warrior Felix knew he could be.

It was confusing to have the same feelings for both Dimitri and Sylvain. Felix knew he was different, in ways he’d rather studiously ignore and _not think about_ , but to love two people at the same time? Felix knew he was gay. He simply didn’t see women the way he was supposed to. Loving two different men on top of that made him even all the more strange according to the societal norms. It was a comfort that his whole class definitely didn’t fit in those rigorous standards, but that didn’t mean he felt comfortable telling anyone what he felt.

Especially now. Now would not have been a good time to talk to anyone about his feelings. So he kept it to himself, living out his days with training to distract him and at night...well. He liked to think he was an active person and that didn’t change once he was alone in his room. He was no sex addict, but he definitely had his fair share of fantasies and pleasurable moments growing up. Just thinking about some of his more risque thoughts had his cheeks flushing a bit. Still, he never had plans to share his feelings.

Dimitri, should he come out of this war alive and sane, was a prince. He was bound to find a queen someday to carry on the family line. Sylvain was an outspoken womanizer and a heart breaker. Even if he’d quietly confessed to their small group that he was bisexual, that didn’t mean Felix could act on his feelings. No, he was prepared to live out his days pining after his two best friends, hoping that, maybe someday, the feelings would fade away. He didn’t think they would though, if the current trend was anything to go by.

What he could do was stay by their sides and keep them safe, keep them alive. They had futures, even if it may not look like it right now. He was going to make sure that they, along with everyone else, got to that future. They were going to take back Fhirdiad some day. They would restore Faerghus and bring hope back to the Faerghan people. Even if it meant giving everything he had to give, he wouldn’t fail. He couldn’t fail. He was going to make sure that when someone died, it would be of old age and not on the battlefield.

“Ah, Felix!”

Annette’s voice snapped Felix out of his thoughts and he looked over as she came bounding over to him. “What?”

The mage rolled her eyes, a smile still on her face despite his brusque response. “Geez, why are you so moody? Anyway, Ashe and I are trying to move some things around in the greenhouse and Dedue is off somewhere else. Could you come help us? Please?”

Felix frowned, though he already knew he was going to say yes. “I’m not a pack mule. And I’m training.”

Annette snorted. “Sure, sure. Come on. Just give us a hand.”

“Alright,” Felix huffed, not sure how to take her lack of response about not being a mule.

“Great!” the mage cheered, running over and wrapping her arms around his. “We’re just moving some heavy stuff around and another set of hands is going to be so helpful. Think of it as strength training if you have to. Oh, I have to tell you though, we’ve gotten some new seeds in and I can’t wait to see what they’re going to grow into! You see, they were all mixed in a bag so we have no idea what we’re going to get. It’s kind of exciting!"

As Annette continued to ramble as she nearly dragged him towards the greenhouse, Felix looked up at the overcast sky. He wasn’t sure when it had stopped raining, but the clouds were starting to break apart and he could see the light of the afternoon sun peeking through. His break had been longer than he’d thought and he frowned to himself about how much time he’d wasted simply sitting. That wouldn’t happen again. He didn’t have time to waste, not with the future battles that lie ahead. He needed to be prepared for anything.

He glanced back down at Annette, who had released his arm as she had run over to Mercedes to recruit the priest as well, and watched as her entire face lit up. Mercedes, too, look extremely pleased as she accepted Annette’s request, who cheered happily. He gave a tiny smile at the scene. It was moments like this, moments where his friends were genuinely happy, that he was fighting for.

Whatever battles lay ahead, he was going to be ready for them. No one was going to get killed by this war. Even if he had to train for every hour of every day for the rest of his life, he was going to make sure that was the case.


End file.
